I am not Strong - i am just numb. When you tell me that I'm strong i feel that you don't see me. I will not recover this is not a cold or the flu, I'm grieving and that's different. I will not always be grieving so intensely, but i will never forget my Finley. And rather than recover i want to incorporate his life and love into the rest of my life. Finley is part of me and always will be, and sometimes i will remember him with joy, and other times with sadness. Both are okay.
I don't have to accept death - yes i understand that it happened, and it is real, but their are somethings in life that are unacceptable.
Please don't avoid me, you cant catch my grief. My world is painful when you are afraid to call or visit or say anything. I am isolated at a time when i need to be most cared about. If you don't know what to say, just touch my arm, give me a hug and just say I'm sorry.
Please don't say to call if i need anything, ill never call because i have no idea what i need. Please send me a card on special holidays and his birthday.
Please say his name, you cannot make me cry, the tears are always there. It gives me the opportunity to shed some tears because someone cared enough to reach out to me!
R.I.P Beautiful baby boy.
I love you always and forever Finley
xxxxxx
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